well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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