i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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