Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
