Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
