Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
