let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
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I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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