I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
