What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
the liver wants what the liver wants
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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