its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
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