it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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