he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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