Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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