I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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