the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize