So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
