Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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