The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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