Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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