your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
we should paint friendship bongs
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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