I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Randomize
