I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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