on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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