My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
