handjob tips. give me some.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
