You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
