Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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