is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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