he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
