The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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