Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
