p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize