so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Randomize
