i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
