how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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