My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
and she was petting her beer can
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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