my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
