Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize