Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
