Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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