i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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