So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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