CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
he high fived his dick after we had sex
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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