you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize