I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize