omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
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