I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize