ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
