in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
