You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
