Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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