hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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