i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
