If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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